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Wife told me she’s a lesbian and wants me personally to dress as a lady every time we’ve intercourse

Wife told me she’s a lesbian and wants me personally to dress as a lady every time we’ve intercourse

Browse Deidre’s replies that are personal today’s issues

  • Deidre Sanders

Dear Deidre

We went along to a dress that is fancy as Cher together with amazing intercourse with my spouse whenever I kept the apparatus on within the room.

However now she’s explained she’s a lesbian and wants me personally to dress as a lady once we have sex.

We’ve been together for 12 years while having two fabulous sons.

Our marriage has become pleased and I also thought our sex-life had been fine — three times per week had been the norm. I’m 32 and she’s 34.

Then we had been invited for this celebration and my spouse suggested we liven up as two homosexual icons.

We went as Cher and she went as Madonna. She purchased me personally a wig and did a job that is great of makeup.

Following the celebration she led me personally upstairs. We started initially to simply just just take my clothes off but she stated: “Leave them in! ”

Seeing me dressed as a lady turned her in as you wouldn’t think.

The intercourse that night was from the scale. She chatted dirty if you ask me and she provided me with the right period of my entire life.

The second evening she wished to try it again so that it continued for two months, beside me decked out as a female.

She ordered stockings that are special underwear for people to fairly share in addition to intercourse ended up being great.

Seeing me dressed as she was turned by a girl in as you wouldn’t think

Then last week-end she dropped the bombshell that she’s been a lesbian all her life and can’t live a lie any further.

She claims she really loves me and I’m a dad that is wonderful she’s secretly constantly fantasised that I’m her gf.

She claims she’s always desired ladies intimately but she’s never ever held it’s place in love with a lady or held it’s place in a relationship with one.

She really wants to stay hitched in my opinion but from now with me dressed as a girl on she wants us to have sex.

Can our wedding survive?

DEIDRE CLAIMS: It’s an ask that is big whether or otherwise not your wedding endures hinges on the method that you sense about it.

You’ve written for me therefore I’m guessing you’ve got several doubts.

Your lady says she’s a lesbian but I’m wondering if this will be really the case.

She can be bisexual or this can be a fetish – and that’s fine for you both if it works.

However it is labelled, the key point is that you must feel liked and desired when it comes to individual you might be.

This really isn’t all about her requirements.

You’re a husband that is loving household guy however you must think about your ­feelings too.

You should be honest both with your lady and yourself and also to understand where your boundaries lie.

Don’t allow your sons see you dressed as a female and don’t believe that you need to constantly cave in to your lady.

My e-leaflet Bisexual problems describes more and you will both find help by seeing an intercourse specialist through Relate (, 0300 100 1234).


SIMPLY over two away from five ladies acknowledge being intimately dissatisfied.

Frequently, neither they nor their partner know how different feminine sexual responses come from men’s.

My e-leaflet How To Thrill A Woman In Bed will help.

Lending cash that is pal kept me personally broke

Dear Deidre

A“friend that is SO-CALLED has ruined my entire life by doing the dirty on me personally.

He’s 26, has two children, and asked me personally for the loan that is short-term of.

He began making month-to-month instalments then destroyed their job and so they stopped.

He told me he previously cash originating from business he’d offered and re re re payments started initially to come in my banking account.

Nevertheless the money had originate from that loan he’d applied for during my title. I’ve attempted to reveal to the mortgage business however they weren’t helpful.

Action Fraud are investigating the identification theft but that doesn’t assistance with the money I’ve lost or the funds I’m told I now owe.

People guidance stated i will go right to the tiny claims court but I can’t also manage sufficient meals. I’m 24.

DEIDRE SAYS: I’m sorry your friend enable you to straight down.

Make a plan to freeze hardly any money advanced to you personally because of the financial institution and have for a duplicate for the credit paperwork and agreement.

If you’re struggling to cover tips such as for instance meals, you can pose a question to your company for the wage advance and visit to test your eligibility for advantages and charity funds.

Brothers have to clean up their work

Dear Deidre

Our two older brothers have let themselves get. I am able to inform by the odor – plus it’s ranking.

They lived with my mom until she died six years back in addition they now share a property. They’re 65 and 67.

I’m 61 and I adore them both dearly but I dread visiting. I need to just take a deep breath on the home before We get in.

The tiles on the floor and the cupboards are coated with grease and the tea towels are stiff and brown in the kitchen. We daren’t also try looking in the restroom.

My oldest bro has the scent of he’s perhaps perhaps perhaps not had a shower or changed their clothing for per year.

How do I inform them they have to be more hygienic and also to clean on their own and their clothing?

DEIDRE CLAIMS: There’s only 1 means. You merely need to, kindly, let them know the facts.

I suppose these people were accustomed your mum care that is taking of. Assist them to prepare the big clean-up, using one space at any given time, or request an agreement cleansing service to place things appropriate.

The moment the restroom is clean, the next move is a shower! Provide them with a directory of the jobs they need to do every day.

If they’re grieving due to their mum, my Coping that is e-leaflet with will help.

I’d forgive cheating partner but simply desire the reality

Dear Deidre

I’M stressed my partner is cheating she says I’m being paranoid on me but.

I’m 28 and she’s 29. We’ve been together for six years and possess two young ones aged five and three.

We work away within the week and it’s simply small things before I get home every Friday like her now changing the towels and putting clean sheets on the bed. She never accustomed.

I came across a brandy glass within the lounge and our container of brandy had gone straight straight down a lot.

She never ever drinks it but stated her friend had come round.

Do we trust my instincts or ignore it? I’ve cheated in past times and I was forgiven by her. I’d forgive her but just desire the reality.

DEIDRE SAYS: It sounds like she’s lonely and feeling unloved. Could you locate a working task nearer house?

Show her you adore her and present her your time and effort.

Make the children off her fingers one afternoon so she can have a breather weekend. That would be all it will take.

Husband is threatening to destroy me personally if she actually leaves him

Dear Deidre

I’VE been having an event with a woman that is married her spouse has learned. I’m now scared on her behalf and me personally.

I’m 32 and she’s 28. This woman is extremely unhappily hitched.

We started seeing one another half a year ago as they are so much in love.

We simply want to be together but her spouse is threatening to destroy me personally if she will leave him.

She’s staying me but we are secretly still in touch with him to protect. She informs me he strikes her and rapes her. I’ve shared with her to go out of but she states she actually is remaining that I can be safe with him as it’s the only way.

DEIDRE CLAIMS: Keep most of the communications m.flirtymania.cim your spouse has delivered you as proof.

Inform the police that he’s threatened to destroy you and that he’s raping their spouse.

She’s in great danger therefore waste any time don’t.

She will (secretly) find advice and help through the nationwide Domestic Violence Helpline (0808 2000 247) or


E-mail me personally right here, personal message me on Facebook, or compose to Deidre Sanders, the sunlight, London SE1 9GF (please enclose SAE).

You may also follow me personally on Twitter@deardeidre.

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